9/27/08

i have full trust in people 2 be the imperfections that we are

advice is sometimes like that new woman that a man chases-its sought after, but once a person gets it, they ignore it
thats just life-
if its one thing that i know u cant CONTROL in this world is the Actions, Feelings & Opinions of other people.
of course u can attempt 2 influence a muthafucka, thats easy-but actually control? NO

now personally, i dont dislike people, but its not very often i put alotta stock in folks.
if u come thru and do what u said u were gonna do-

then hell yeah, "u my nigga! or my girl!"
u dont?- well fuck it,
pick it up & move on.
depending on other muthafuckas 2 make or break your day & or lifestyle aint my thang
its good 2 have that person or people that enhance the fuck out of it, but make or break?
u settin' yourself of 4 failure outside of blood- and by blood, i damn near only mean kids.
nobody should mean THAT much 2 u 2 where u cant function without them.
& this aint one of them "fuck love" joints, far from it.
just one of them- "dont put all ya eggs in one basket" joints.
humans are predictable at times, but totally un-fuckin predictable at others.
nothing wrong wit love & trust, but if or when that person u love and trust slips and disappoints u
it cant be a situation that is crippling. u cant let it cripple u, whether it be fianancially or emotionally.
nothing wrong with givin' your all- i wouldnt want a girl i considered mine 2 be on some half-ass shit,
but when what u thought was perfect doesnt exactly pan out the way u dreamt it, hopefully u are in a position 2 be able 2 keep it movin.

"along the road 2 recovery i see 2many emotional wrecks sittin on the side of what they thought was the road 2 happiness"

searchin 4 happiness inside another person is a bad muthafucka when u find it
but when that shit turns uglythat shit gets UGLY
im not a loner, cuz i keep me some companionship
but at the same time when the times comes that a nigga is by hisselfim good that way as well

now im a lady lovin' ass muthafucka, so i damn sure love it more WITH than without.

but when im on bold and it aint a muthafucka in sight wantin 2 deal wit a nigga
its no big deal either.
u wont catch me mopin' & all that bullshit. my happiness aint dependent on nobody but me- its hard 2 surprise me nowadays
im the only person that can disappoint me. & even during those times that i dont accomplish what i had intended on doing i aint dwellin' on it- dust yourself off and move on.everything thats right or wrong in my life- IS MY FAULT

whether other people were involved or not- whatever goes down, i most likely had a choice in the matter somewhere along the line
a nigga shiftin' blame dont solve shit, if u are a blame shifter, u most likely will keep finding yourself in fucked up situations til' u look in the mirror 1 day and own up 2 some of the bullshit choices u keep makin and try and figure out what u can do 2 change your ways, cuz something obviously is wrong when u decide shit on your own.
one thing i realize more & more everyday is how un-ready i am 4 a 1-on-1 relationshipwith a woman.
when u are in a relationship u have 2 ALWAYS be there 4 that person
i like 2 take my breaks from people 2 much
& it aint NOTHING personal at all. people take it that way- but thats truely just the way i am
whether its the person i love the most or even just one of my closest niggaz
sometimes i just take my breaks, breaks last as long as they last.
its better i take a break, than 2 sit up in ya face and we fall out cuz u really aint gonna like what my simmerin "tired of being around yo ass" feelin ass got 2 say
thats just the way i am.
i still wanna come & go as i please & i am GONNA come & go as i please without ANY fuckin questions that i HAVE 2 answer.
ill go days without wanting 2 see u as well, that dont mean i dont love yo ass.that just means i was chillin'
a nigga may have just felt like doin his own thang4 these coupla days.

my mindframe right now aint structured 2 fit inside the confines of a relationship. nothing wrong with relationships whatsoever i just know me.
& i dont have the mindframe 4 it- at least not 2 day anyway

HOLLA AT ME....

just 2 let u know....Cuz u should know

this blog right here should have been my 1st one over here on blogspot

this is an introduction 2 anyone who will begin 2 read my blogs

2 cut straight 2 the point the majority of the time
a nigga just likes 2 talk shit, sometimes ALOTTA shit

but i always have a point, sometimes poignant- sometimes im all over the place
its always on the fly but im always real wit it

at least whatever real is from my perspective, lol
this aint the place 4 the grammar police & this damn sure aint the place 4 spellcheckers
i know how 2 write the RIGHT way when i need 2, but when i blog, i blog the way i talk
when im fuckin wit my boyz or at the damn barber shop or somethin', not the way i would talk in front of them folks, lol

so if u cant tolerate "perceived" ignorance then this definitely aint the blog u wanna fuck wit'


im just a regular dude, whatever regular means, lol that uses these blogs 2 express
my opinions on whatever it is i might wanna talk about at the time being

early 30 year old black male raised in the inner city,
a lover of sports- football, basketball & boxing mostly
a lover of music- jazz, hip hop & r&b- pretty much SOUL music
REAL SOUL MUSIC though, i aint into pop music rather it be rap or the shit
they label as r&b that these kids listen 2, lol
when i say soul music i mean SOUL music 4 real

& my biggest love of all, the perpetual of all perpetuals is the love/hate relationship i have with & 4 women

in the comin blogs, u will gain insight into what it is that makes me tick as a sex,music & sports addict/fanatic

well there is my INTRO 1 blog late, lol
but there it is

HOLLA AT ME

MIXED signals....???

wassup yall?

ive been accused of being the king of the "mixed" signal @ times during my career as a womanizer, lol
now, is a mixed signal STILL a mixed signal if its unintentionally sent?
cuz im good 4 telling a woman i dont want a woman/relationship yet still fuck around and do "relationship type shit" as ive been told, with that very same woman.

(& 4 the record, i never claimed 2 be a PIMP, so there are some rules & guidelines i dont necessarily abide by, especially when it comes 2 so called PIMP shit- ive always just been a Hoe, no way around it...there are codes 2 my shit as well, dont get it twisted)

now 2 me, what i said 2 the woman from the beginning STILL STANDS til i SAY otherwise. thats me in a nutshell, if i aint say it dont do that READ'n in between the lines B.S. or none of that shit wit me- just ask me and ill gladly give u the latest update on where my head, heart & intentions are at.
but, as simple as that shit is 4 me 2 grasp, alotta women ive dealt with find my ways confusing, and since its happened alot more times than i can count i realize & have 2 sorta accept the fact that im the dude at fault....
now if it was only sometimes, maybe i could still place the blame on alotta the women ive run across & thru, but when it happens as much as it has i have 2 accept that i MUST indeed be something like the KING of the mixed signal
(@ least something like it, lol- there are sometimes yall just be on some oblivious 2 logic, reason & reality and just plain & simply put "dick-whipped into la-la land" ol' bullshit, lol)
well another reason this topic has been on my mind is i know im not the only person out here that cant actually read minds

u may either WANT a nigga or u may just WANNA BEFRIEND a nigga
but from a nigga'z perspective that shit aint always easy 2 decipher. some dudes take ANY sign of cordial convo or any advance as a chance that woman has "interest" in fuckin wit him on some other shit (especially if he already may secretly desire her & admires her) when that surely aint always the case. some of us dont know how 2 handle friendly conversation sometimes, lol
the hope factor can cloud judgment/vision & what u THINK u see is what u WANT 2 SEE, but not necessarily a reality.
then u got some dudes that couldnt catch a hint either way if a woman doesnt flat out say the shit whether she is feelin alot or if she's feeling him not.
we as people (not all) have continuously over time approached situations with hidden agendas or at least "guarded intentions" (i like that term better, lol) & as a result we also look 4 the hidden agenda by tryin 2 decipher the unspoken.
have u ever thought somebody was feelin u & once u approached them or spoke up about it u got dissed? or told exactly the opposite of what u assumed?

we mislead as well as misinterpret just as much as the other i believe.
just as a woman can take a man TRYING 2 FUCK as a MAN TRYING 2 MARRY
a dude can take a woman ACCEPTIN' FREE DRINKS as a WOMAN possibly WANTING 2 FUCK
not great examples but examples of potentially misinterpreted/misleading situations


if u feel me & u gotta 'pinion & shit, lol, express yo self
dont tell us what we wanna hear- tell us what we need 2 know

HOLLA AT ME